In the “You Must Be Frakkin’ JOKING” department:

...aka The Women Who Announce Their Lack Of Lives To The World Dept. I mean, just stamp "loser" on your forehead and be DONE with it...it'll be cheaper. Dear fuckin' gods. Nothing says "sad & pathetic" quite like that. Though from what I've seen of the -ites, the Small & Medium sizes are very unnecessary.